Sense and Sensibility

So, this has nothing to do with the novel. Honestly, I've never even read a sentence of it. However, what it is about, is a sense of belonging. A place to call home. A community to share love and truth with that returns the favor, or gives unselfishly.

When Mike and I left Orlando, it was to pursue some longterm goals of ministry. We were saddened to leave behind all of our friends and community, especially from our church. It was the only church either of us had ever really called home. A year later, several of our dearest friends left the area to pursue some of their aspirations. It was again a bittersweet time.

As we started to settle in to Raleigh, things quickly became difficult. I never really felt like we experienced the "honeymoon" period with the new church and Mike's position. We made friends along the way and really began to see lives transformed in our home. As Mike's job drew to a close, we not only lost a job, but a church and many friends.

Since then, we (maybe more so I), have struggled with feeling on the fence. LOST! We quickly found another church that we love and respect, but still struggled with feeling at home, even checking out a small group. The school I work at his been the best community, but it hasn't quite been the same. Most of my good friends there are in different stages of life and as much as I love them, we simply have conflicting schedules and no time to really fellowship or hang out. They've been a great blessing, but haven't provided a community for us both.

We've held off on really investing more somewhere. We've held on to the idea of returning to Orlando and picking up with where we left off. We have great ideas of what life would be like back there, but for now, that's not an option. As we visited some friends (and sunshine) over spring break, we heard one thing over and over again: be faithful exactly where you are. We realized over that week that our heart has been in one place, while we were physically in another. We longed for a sense of belonging and found ourselves revisiting the idea of "when ___________ happens, everything will be ok." It's been a rocky week. We simply just felt like we didn't belong anywhere.

Well, it's amazing how big a small gesture can be. Mike was offered an opportunity to serve alongside some dear leaders in our community. It was amazing how this changed my entire idea of a sense of belonging. I automatically felt not only welcome, but loved, valued, and important. Of course this had to do more with Mike, but it gave me a whole new idea of community. It is truly amazing to me that someone can see some things in you for knowing you for such short time, can believe in you, and can love you in a way that others can't, that have known you and worked alongside you much longer. The only thing I know that can make that possible is the power of the Gospel.

So, to all of you readers, especially friends, thank you for your love. Thank you for your wisdom. Thank you especially to all of those here that have loved on us unconditionally through this challenging time. You open arms have allowed us to wade through this season and bring our hearts back to our community. We are incredibly grateful for the friends that have surrounded us and welcomed us as refuges. Those that have shared their struggles with us, pray for us, and battled with us.